TESTIMONIES
by Lt. David Russell, Retired
Riverside County Sheriff's Department
I was raised in a Catholic home and attended parochial school. I believed in Jesus as the Christ (Savior), and that through Him (via the Church) we could be assured of salvation. I believed in the Holy Trinity. Jesus was very real and personal to me. I knew Christmas to be the celebration of our Savior's birth, and that Easter commemorates His resurrection. I came in contact with many godly Christian men and women. I came in contact with many who thought they were godly, and others who lived godly. (The difference was relationship.)
As I grew in the Catholic faith, I became confused over church doctrine and disillusioned with some of the church teachings, especially confession through a common, mortal man-even though he was a priest. How could a "man" forgive my sins? How could a "man" excommunicate me from the presence of God?
As I got into my teen years I started hanging out with non-believers. When they asked me about Jesus Christ I didn't have answers. Consequently, I stopped going to church when I was sixteen. Somewhere along the line I missed knowing the difference between being religious, and having a true relationship
A large part of my reason for leaving the "church" was my desire for self pleasure, and not wanting anything to stand in my pursuit of personal gratification. I fell deep into sexual sin, but never found true contentment in those relationships. (If I had been a woman, I would have been called a tramp.) I was into drinking and the bar scene. I thought a fifth of scotch, smoking, gambling, and telling dirty jokes was a good time. I also went hunting, fishing, and played league softball-(I wasn't totally into a life of depravity.) And I never became a total atheist. I investigated various world religions and read some of their literature. I may have let go of God but God didn't let me go.
While in the Navy I was asked by a shipmate to go to church with him. I heard the message and when the invitation was given I went forward. I was prayed over, and had hands laid upon me to receive Jesus Christ, but I did not surrender my heart to Him, and I walked away alone. I kept looking, but could not find what I was looking for.
By 1973 I was single due to divorce, and I had reached the depths of my depravity in both adultery and fornication. It was in this "black hole" that I realized the only truly fulfilling sexual encounter is found in the marriage bed through agape love. In November 1973, I broke off all sexual relationships and started dating Donna, and we were married in May of 1974.
I still had numerous questions about God that needed to be answered. The Lord placed Dennis , a strong Christian deputy, in my path. We were working graveyard, which allowed some time to take a break and meet for coffee or lunch. As I asked the questions the Holy Spirit led Dennis in his responses. (Thank you Lord for men who are your willing vessels.)
I thought that I was getting my life together and finding some contentment. I had my health, a loving family, a great home, a job I loved, a bachelors degree, a bright future and financial security. I thought I had it made, and by the world's standards I did. It was from this perspective of thanksgiving that I repented of my sins and came back into a relationship with God. I thought I was coming with a heart of thanksgiving, and not in need of anything.
In 1977, alone in a black-and-white, en route to my beat, I was overcome by the Holy Spirit. He made me realize I still had a need-it was Jesus who I was looking for. My need was not only to confess Jesus Christ as my Lord, but that I needed a personal relationship with Him as well. I prayed for His forgiveness. I repented and asked God back into my life. I did not find salvation in a bolt of lightning or from a particularly effective evangelist. It came that night in the black-and-white.
But I still did not understand how deep into sin I had actually sunk. Though I now had a new peace, my lifestyle was not immediately changed. My growth in Christ came slowly and deliberately. I struggled out of ignorance. I claimed Christ as my savior, but I was not in prayer daily. I was not in fellowship within a church body. I was still unequally yoked with nonbelievers. However, I did add Christian cops to my circle of friends, and discussed Christ's glory with them. (God can only do in our lives what we allow Him do.)
I started reading the Bible sporadically and entered into a trivial prayer life. I sometimes, out of ignorance, sat at the kitchen table and drank beer while reading the Bible. I was a baby in Christ, adrift in the world without a church in which to worship Him and to fellowship with His people, and to learn His will for my life. I had no one to disciple me, and did not realize that when we disciple ourselves we have a weak teacher who neither gives sound direction nor holds us accountable.
Donna and I were at odds over my feeble reformation. My lead was flawed, and she remained a backslider. I would attempt to get into the Word, and Donna would get jealous and try to disrupt my fellowship with God.
In 1979, Donna and I went on a Marriage Encounter weekend. It was a gift from God. We grew closer in our relationship with each other. We started going to church, a Catholic Church. From my limited Bible reading, I believed the Mass to be based on Scripture. It was a time of worshipping God our Creator and Jesus our Savior. Donna and the kids went with me, but I was the only one who felt fed.
A couple we'd met in Marriage Encounter understood our problem. He had been raised Catholic, but not her. They suggested we attend Calvary Chapel Riverside (now Harvest Christian Fellowship). We went to a service on the last Sunday of 1979. With one service we knew this was the church for us, and have been there since-as a family.
It was at Harvest that I came to realize the importance of my personal relationship with Christ. I grew in the Lord as I continued to read His Word and as we heard God's message each week.
I confessed Jesus Christ as my Savior and Lord to both believers and nonbelievers. As Greg gave the weekly alter call, I would pray for Donna and all there to make the commitment. Every time Greg led us in the "sinners' prayer" I would pray it in my heart, and still do to this day.
While we were on a second Marriage Encounter weekend in November of 1980, Donna realized that she needed to make a personal commitment. I prayed with her, and she gave her life to Christ. Now we are truly a Christian couple with the hope of Salvation. "Praise God!"
The joy I find in my relationship with Jesus continues to amaze me. Yes, I was once a backslider, steeped in a life of sin. But He-my Jesus-has taken away smoking, drinking, debauchery, adultery and shallow relationships. He has given me peace, hope, joy and fellowship, not only with Him but with His followers as well. He has provided to me a beautiful and loving helpmeet who is my closest friend and a sister in our Lord Jesus. And, most of all, He has guaranteed our Salvation. My sins were washed away, but not by anything I did or could ever do; they were washed away by the blood of Jesus Christ.
"What can wash away my sin? Nothing but the blood of Jesus."
Lt. David Russell, Retired
Riverside County Sheriff's Department
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